I find it fascinating to think about how much our lives are influenced by perspective. Perspective is the way we look at or think about something. So is our perspective something we can always control? Do we have the power to choose our perspective on any given experience?
On his blog WisdomForLife Steve Cornell writes,
‘We can’t always choose our circumstances but we can usually choose our perspective toward them.
Here are a couple of quotes I like, that I believe illustrate how easily our perspective can influence our experiences.
“Everybody is a genius. But, if you judge a fish by its ability to climb a tree, it will spend its whole life believing that it is stupid.” ~Albert Einstein
“The world is round and the place which may seem like the end may also be only the beginning.” ~Ivy Baker Pries
Here is the story of my recent ‘Get some Perspective’ moment. Also known to my husband as a ‘Suck it up princess moment’.
I have just had a fantastic weekend away with both my siblings and our families. I had been looking forward to it for weeks. I love being with my family. To them I am the same person I was before my stroke. They all make so much effort to ensure I feel a part of everything (my brother and sister-in-law as much as my siblings). They all join forces to get the kids ready for a day at the beach, choose somewhere accessible for me, make sure I can interact with them and give me lots of baby cuddles.
Most of the time I am able to stay positive, keep a good perspective. I am able to count my blessings, not least of which include: healthy and happy kids, a big family that love me, the sun on my face, the wind in my hair, and being able to share the moments with those I love.
But being with my family can be a double-edged sword. I haven’t spoken to them about this so I hope I explain myself well. Ali and Courtney have very similar values to me. They represent the kind of Mums, Aunties and sisters that I have always tried to be. While there are many aspects of those roles I can still perform, there are many that I can’t. I can’t pick up my nephew and comfort him when he’s crying, I can’t play in the sand, I can’t whip up dinner for 18, I can’t chase my nieces and nephews around etc.
While on most days I can focus on what I can do, I still have my moments of grief. “Despair is always colorblind; it can only see the dark tints” (David A. Hubbard).
Then driving home we were listening to Guy Sebastian. ‘Don’t worry, be happy’ came on. I can still remember the first time I heard that song. It was in 2011. I was babysitting kel and Donnie’s kids – they had gone to a staff Christmas party. As soon as I heard it, it made me think of Kel..
During her 3 year battle with cancer, she lived by the lyrics of that song. In fact she did so until her dying day. For those of you that met her, I’m sure your lives were forever changed. She fought through pain and sickness for each and every day. She took with open arms, each hour she was given with her kids, hubby, family and friends. And she did it with a smile on her face. Boy do we take life for granted.
I’d like to share some of those lyrics with you.
“Is it really that bad?
Really that bad
I don’t think it’s really that bad
Come on, get with it.”
“If you only think of things that you haven’t got
You could have it all and still never have enough
So don’t worry (don’t worry), be happy (be happy).”
“Yeah life is short
We only get to live it once
So live and love
And give it all you’ve got.”
So Kel lost her battle with cancer just a few months ago. In death, as in life, she is keeping me honest. Listening to this song, made me cry like a baby. I miss her so much. She lost everything in teaching me the most valuable life lesson. “If you only think of things that you haven’t got
You could have it all and still never have enough”. So love and forgive like its your last day on Earth. Tell those you love how much they mean to you. And above all else, live every day to the full. See life as a gift and give thanks.
So in honour of our inspirational comrades that have fallen in this life, we owe it to them to choose happiness. To choose a GOOD PERSPECTIVE.
3 thoughts on “Perspective”
Hi Steph, It is really hard when we have those memory triggers, maybe it was your lovely friend Kel’s way of letting you know she is looking down on you. Love Nina
Beautiful…..so true xx
Thankyou so much Steph, love the way you think, love that Kelly’s words, strength, love and life continue to help you see the many Blessings in Living, and Life.
She has and will always continue to strengthen all those who know her, I see her strength in you .. sending you a huge Hug, xxx